WritersShowcase

She was not feeling well.  The knot in her throat, that had started when she left the house eight hours ago, had only magnified.. She wanted to throw up, but her stomach was empty. When the flight attendant had passed with the drinks trolley, she only asked for water. The plastic glass, was sitting in front of her on the small folding tray. She wanted to have some more water but was too ashamed to ask. She did not want to disturb the staff. Next to her, near the window, a Pinoy was guzzling beer after beer, as though it were his last. When his cans were empty he lifted himself out of his seat, barely apologizing, went to the galley and came back with some more, soon emptied. She was too ashamed to get out of her seat and do the same. She tried to get some sleep, but she could only close her eyes for a few seconds. They had told her that the flight would last nine hours. She looked at her watch and saw that she had another six hours to endure. On the other side, next to the aisle, a woman was breast-feeding a infant. She had lifted her t-shirt while covering her self with a towel. Aurora could only see the feet of the baby. Once in a while the woman lifted the towel to check and move her child back to the nipple. She looked at Aurora and smiled.

"You ok, Tita?"

"Not really".

"This your first trip on a plane?"

"O po"

Not only was it her first trip on a plane, but it was her first trip outside her neighborhood, farthest from her family she had ever gone

"You should eat something."

When the plane staff passed the food trays, she declined because she knew that her stomach would not accept anything. "I can’t" she said

The Pinoy on the other side lit a cigarette, which he was deeply inhaling before releasing the smoke. She did not like the smell of smoke because it gave her headaches. At home, her father and brothers were all heavy smokers, but she could always go outside to get some fresh air to escape the smell. But here, there was no escape; she had to weather the smell. The lady with the baby asked the smoker to stop many times, showing the baby, but each time he refused, oblivious to the discomfort her was creating "If you do not like the smoke, you should have asked for a non-smoking seat", he coldly said, while resuming to puff. The plane was full, so there was no possibility of switching to another seat.

To distract herself, she tried to read the travel magazine in the seat pocket in front of her, but it was in English. Her English was good, not limited to Taglish, the English Tagalog pidgin of the Philippines. After looking through the pictures which were showing places she did not know, advertising things she could not afford, she quickly lost interest and the magazine was stored back..

The mother had finished with the feeding operation, when she asked Aurora if she could hold her baby for a second so that she could lift herself out of her seat. While the baby was in her lap, she looked at it. It was already sleepy and its mouth was soiled with milk. In a motherly reflex, she took a paper napkin she had stashed away in her sleeve and cleaned its mouth.

Her three babies, Jay, Jossy, and Jewel had to be left behind. She left them in the care of Lola and Lolo, the grandparents. She was worried about how they would fare without her. She missed them dearly and knew she would not see them for the next two years, but life had given her no choice, but to leave them behind. For two years she would not be able take care of them, see them growing up and share their joys and pains. Little Jewel was only two, she would be a little girl when she will be back, she wondered if she would even recognize her mother after all that time. Jay forced himself not to cry when she had left the Jeepney that had brought the whole family to the airport. At six he wanted to look like a little man, and men do not cry. Jossy had cried the entire time on the way to the airport. Although she was only four, she felt that Nanay was going to leave her. She had no idea where or for how long, but she was already feeling the separation. Her mother tried vainly to comfort her but the heart was not there. The little girl had felt the pain in her mother. Everybody in the Jeepney had taken Jossy and tried to sooth her cries, to no avail.

Aurora was in the middle of her dreams when she felt the lady take her child back.

"Thank you. Can I bring you something?"

"Some water please"

"I will send the flight attendant with water"

"No, I do not want to disturb"

"It’s OK" then she left to the back of the plane.

A few moments later, a smiling flight attendant in her smart uniform covered by an apron sat next to her. She had brought a glass of water with a little peanuts tray that she disposed in front of her.

"This is your first flight, Tita?" She said in Tagalog

"O po"

"Do you feel sick? Can I get you something? I can bring you airsickness pills. They will help you sleep"

"I do not want to disturb you, po"

"That is not a problem. It is my job to make your trip as comfortable as possible. I will be right back"

The flight attendant left the seat to go the back of the plane. The mother came back with her baby, asked her to hold it for a second so that she could sit down. Aurora obliged. Meanwhile, the flight attendant returned with the medicine bottle and a plastic glass of water with ice. She poured two capsules in a small paper cup and handed them both over.

"Here, swallow that with some water, In five minutes, you will feel better"

Although her throat was still knotted, she swallowed the capsules then took out the paper napkin that the hostess had given her to clean her mouth.

"Salamat po"

"If you need anything just push on that button", said the stewardess, showing the small control panel on the side of the armrest. "And do not hesitate; I know how it is to be on a plane for the first time. Believe it or not, it also happened to me, once." She added with a warm smile before going to the aft section of the plane.

"Feeling better Tita?" asked the mother.

"Not yet"

"Try to sleep; the capsules will very soon take effect"

Aurora leaned towards her small sports bag that she had stored under her feet and extracted her small leather purse from it. She opened the purse to take her rosary out. She replaced the purse back in the sports bag and leaned backward trying to relax. The mother showed her how to push the seat back, "Push on that button, the back of the seat will tilt backward. You will feel more comfortable", she said. She did as she was instructed to do, stretch her legs forward and closed her eyes, trying to concentrate on the rosary.

"Our lady who is in the heaven …."

But soon, she was back reliving the last moments with her family in the parking lot of the airport.

Only passengers were allowed inside the lobby, so she kissed everybody, while trying to hold her tears, before she had to leave them behind. Walking from the Jeepney, Aurora tried not to look back, because she was afraid she would not be able walk to the gate, she did not want her family to see her tears.

When she finally disappeared in the crowd, it was the last time her family would ever see their daughter, mother, and sister in this world.

Once inside the lobby, in the midst of the hundreds of travelers, each with their suitcases and bags piled up high on dollies, she was felt utterly alone.

The once radiant woman, the Cinderella on her way to highest level of the social ladder, was now a clumsy nobody lost in an alien world. Life had taken away her assertiveness and replaced it by apprehensiveness. She felt like a complete stranger, intimidated by the unfamiliar environment.

All her worldly belongings were now reduced to a purse and a small sports bag.

There were several long lines of passengers lining up in front of the desks, behind the which uniformed staff were actively distributing tickets, weighing luggages and examining the passports. On top of the counters large display panels were announcing the flights Tokyo, Singapore, London, Jeddah and other places she knew by only name or had seen them on her small black and white TV at home.

She took her place at the end of the line going to Jeddah. In front of her, people were pushing dollies with mountains of boxes and suitcases. Slowly, the line moved forward until she was facing the attendant.

"Passport, and ticket, please. How many pieces of luggage?"

Aurora showed her small sports bag, almost ashamed not to have an overloaded dolly like the other people on the line

"That’s it?" asked the clerk a little astonished. Obviously, she was more used to overweight passengers than to underweight ones "You can keep it in cabin."

"Typical first timer." the clerk thought, while asking her "Smoker, non smoker? Aisle, window?"

Aurora had no idea what it meant, so she answered "Whatever"

"A real first timer" winked the attendant while passing her passport to another clerk, sitting behind her. This one was a female, had her head covered by a scarf tied under her chin, completely hiding her hairs, showing only the face. Aurora had seen Muslims before in the palenke.

She opened it, flipped the pages quickly until she found the Visa. "OCW?" she asked her. Aurora looked at her, puzzled, not knowing what to say.

"Oversea Contract Worker? Are you going to Saudi Arabia to work?"

"Yes. I have been hired to work as housemaid"

The passport was soon returned to her with a boarding pass.

"Gate 10, departure 11, you have to be at the gate one half hour before departure. Do you have the airport tax voucher?" Asked the counter attendant.

"What tax voucher?"

"See that booth over there, that’s were you get the tax voucher" answered the attendant before addressing her self to the next passenger.

She walked to the indicated booth where a small line was moving quickly. Each person in the line was holding one or more 500 Pesos bills. She looked on top of the booth "Airport tax: 500 Pesos"

Five hundred Pesos!,

That was all she had in her purse. Tatay had given her the bill before she left the house. "It is not much, but that’s all I can give you"

Five hundred Pesos!

The equivalent of two weeks of work with her small canteen, a fortune, and that was all the money she had. She started to panic.

The line had moved and she was now facing the booth window where a clerk was looking at her with visible impatience and a voucher already in his hand.

Five hundred Pesos!

Nobody had told her anything about the airport tax. Not at the agency were she got her contract and ticket, not at the embassy were she got the visa. Even her brothers, already in Saudi Arabia for several years had told her nothing.]

"Hey Tita! Five hundred pesos!" Said the booth attendant. She opened her purse, and extracted the precious bill from it .It was now replaced by a small slip of paper.

The next passenger pushed her to the side, while presenting several bills at the booth. Not only was she alone but she was also penniless. She looked inside the purse and found a few coins: Seven Pesos and fifty Centavos. That was all she had left. Close to panicking, she felt the tears coming back , and took a paper napkin out of her purse to dry her eyes. There was no going back: she did not even have the money to go back home.

Aurora looked around to see where to go, as she had never been in an airport lobby before. She saw a gate with a line of people moving slowly forward. On top of the doors, she saw a panel labeled ‘Departure’, so she took place at the end of the line. At the gate, a conveyor belt on which every passenger laid their belonging before walking through a steel frame. Once in a while the frame would beep and the passenger was asked to empty his pockets before passing again. When it was her turn she did as she ordered by the security attendant, she placed her bag and purse on the belt and walked through the frame. She heard a beep coming through the frame, which came as a shock to her.

"Empty your pockets, remove your watch" said the attendant mechanically "and walk through the machine again. "

She went back through the frame, which beeped again. She was slightly alarmed, but this time the attendants said nothing, so she removed her watch and placed it on the counter next to the frame and she passed through the detector again. This time there was no beep. She took her watch and walked to the other end of the conveyor belt to take her bag and purse, but there was no bag and purse to be seen. She looked around in total anguish. After the five hundred Pesos bill, she had lost everything, even her passport and boarding pass that she had secured in her purse. ‘Purse snatchers even in airports?’, she wondered in alarm. Seeing her distress, the security guard at the end of the belt asked her "Problem Tita?"

"My purse, my bag" that’s the only thing she could say before real tears rolled from her eyes.

When she had to re-pass through the metal detector frame, other passengers had laid their belonging on the belt and un-reclaimed objects had been stored on a table to prevent jams.

"It’s not on the table?" asked the attendant indicating the small table next to her.

Both objects were in plain sight and soon embarrassment replaced her panic. Sheepishly, she took her stuff and followed the crowd. The large corridor ended in a T-junction where some people went left, others went right. She looked around for some indication on where to go , but she only saw big numbers: 1-5, with an arrow indicating Left, 6-10 with an arrow indicating Right. There was no indication for Jeddah, her final destination. Most of the crowd was going Left, so not knowing better, she followed the crowd, taking the Left direction. Along the large corridor, she could see the big, frightening planes behind large window bays. She kept walking until she reached a place were the crowd seemed to stop walking and had started to assemble. There were long rows of plastic seats. Majority were already occupied by waiting passengers. She found an empty seat next to a Japanese businessman who was deeply engrossed in a newspaper. Around her, people were sitting holding bags, children were playing, mothers were yelling at their kids to stay quite and not to wander away. More people came and occupied the remaining seats. After what seemed liked an eternity, an attendant at the small counter, using a public address system announced : "The passengers for Tokyo are ready to embark. Seats 35 to 45, families with small children will embark first. Please have your boarding pass ready"

"I am not going to Tokyo" Aurora thought and looked around for some help.

"Is this going to Jeddah?" She asked the Japanese businessman.

"No Jeddah, Tokyo".

"Where is Jeddah?"

"Ask the attendant, " replied the Japanese while indicating the counter.

She quickly walked to the counter and addressed herself to the attendant, "Is this the plane going to Jeddah?"

"No ,this is Tokyo."

The attendant quickly checked her computer "The flight to Jeddah is in gate 10" She said showing the direction from which she had came "And you better make it fast, the boarding is almost complete and they are about to close the gate."

Aurora started to run as fast as she could upstream, the incoming crowd. She was feeling her heart beating hard in her chest, her breath becoming shorter, but she kept on running. She had arrived at the "T" junction and spotted a cleaner mopping the soiled tiles "Is this the direction for the plane to Jeddah?"

The cleaner looked at her with a bland face, shrugged "I don’t know", and resumed his work.

She kept running passing in front of several empty departure lobbies. There were no planes behind the windowed bays. At the end of the corridor, at the last gate, all the seats were now empty and a couple of passengers were still lining up in front of the exit door. Completely out of breath, she tried to talk to the attendant, but could not. The run had left her gasping. She put her hand on her heart trying to calm down the beating. Never in her life had she run so long and so fast.

"Boarding card please "asked the attendant.

She took the card out of her purse and handed it to the attendant ,"You have to be at the exit gate thirty minutes ahead of departure, you are lucky, we were about to close. My colleague at the Tokyo gate just called me to tell me you were coming" said the attendant in a reproving tone. ‘More embarrassment ’, she thought. The attendant tore the boarding pass in two and handed her the stub. "This way" showed the attendant pointing to the exit door. Aurora walked through the door and found herself in a long metallic tunnel that curved at the end. She saw the last passengers disappear to the left. When she reached the elbow, she saw the door of the plane where two air attendants in smart crisp uniforms were welcoming the arriving passengers.

"What seat please?"

No idea what her seat was. She looked at the attendant questioningly, not knowing what to say. "Show me your boarding pass" asked the attendant, with her finger pointing at the stub she had in her hand.. She handed the piece of paper to the flight attendant.

"Seat 43B" told the attendant, while showing right with her hand "This way please"

She boarded the plane and start walking along the aisle. The plane was divided in three groups of seat rows, all full. She looked ahead and could see more and more crowded rows. ‘Where was 43B?’, she thought, but kept on walking until another uniformed attendant again asked for her seat number."43B" she answered proud of her new acquired knowledge.

"Keep walking" said the attendant showing the next section.

She saw small numbers below the luggage bins: 39, 40, 41, 42, 43. On her right three seats, the middle one still unoccupied. The aisle seat was occupied by a woman with a baby in her lap. "Is this 43B?" Aurora asked.

"Yes" answered the woman, awkwardly standing up to open some passage way.

She squeezed herself between the mother and the back of the previous seat and finally eased herself in her assigned seat, keeping her bag and purse in her lap. Attendants were walking along the aisles locking the still-opened bins and checking the passengers to the left and to the right.

"Seat belt please" The attendant instructed her

She looked at the attendant, not knowing what to do, more shame.

"You have to lock your seat belt" said the mother smiling to her. "You are sitting on it"

She searched around for the belts, and finally felt it under her buttocks. She put her bag and purse at her feet, under the previous seat and lifting herself picked the two parts up. She looked at the metal contraptions at both ends trying to figure out what to do. Under the instruction of the attendant, she finally succeeded in locking and tightening the belt. That done, she tried to relax..

After a few minutes, she felt a jolt, the plane started to move slowly backward. In front of her, at the end of the section, two attendants were demonstrating something, while the PA was talking about seat belts, safety vests, exit gates and a lot of things she could not understand. The message was repeated in Tagalog and a language she could not recognize. "Is that Arabic?", she wondered. It was the first time she heard this language. Then the lights dimmed down, leaving only little spots of light here and there. She heard a growling noise and felt the whole plane vibrate. It then started to move forward. Her neighbor sitting on the next seat was looking absently through the window. After a few minutes of moves and stops, she felt the plane had stopped its course. Looking through the window, she could only see far away lights in the dark of the night. Then the plane started to vibrate more and more while she heard the roaring of the engines going crescendo. She sensed the plane moving forward, faster and faster. Her abdomen, her whole body pushed back by of the acceleration. She could hear and feel the wheels rolling on the tarmac, "blum, blum, blum" then suddenly the vibrations from the wheels stopped. The plane had taken off.

Looking apprehensively through the window she could see that the lights had been replaced by darkness. She heard some rumbling noises and then only the humming noise of the engines. Aurora tried to calm her fears, but could not. She felt helpless, locked inside a monstrous box, at the mercy of some frightening organism. Again she felt tears come to her eyes – this time out of anxiety. She took the napkin out of her sleeve to sop her eyes, she then closed her eyes, trying to survive the ordeal. She heard the whine of the engines easing up and suddenly the lights came on. Above her head the "Non smoking" sign was switched off and she heard the speakers announcing things about cigars and pipe and aisles and toilets she could not understand. Her neighbor to the left lit a cigarette and she could see puffs of smoke floating above several seats.

That was two hours ago now, and since then her anxiety had not subsided. She tried to get comfort from the rosary in her hands and to concentrate on the prayers "…pray for us poor sinners …", while she started to feel the effects of her pill : she felt drowsy and slowly she fell asleep.

 "Ladies and gentlemen, we are now approaching Jeddah airport, were we will land in thirty minutes. Please return to your seat, straighten your seat back, and fasten your seat belts. Saudi Arabia being a Muslim country does not allow possession of alcoholic beverages. Our staff will circulate between the aisles to collect bottles and cans."

The bright lights and the public address announcements had waken her up. Somebody had laid a blanket on her while she was sleeping. She slowly moved her head up looking around. Everywhere people were preparing for the landing, straightening seats, closing trays, going back to their seats. The attendants walked slowly between the seats checking seatbelts, straightening backseats, collecting earphones, blankets, and plastic glasses.

Suddenly Aurora felt something in her ears, a piercing pain had invaded her head. She put her hands on both ears trying to get some release, to no avail. The hurting was getting harder as if her ears would explode. The baby next to her started to cry. She knew enough about babies to know that he, too, was in distress. He must have felt the same pain, the excruciating pain. His mother signaled a passing attendant asking for some water. She had a few plastic glasses and a bottle of water. She gave one to the mother, then, seeing Aurora with the hands on the ears and the distress look in the eyes said, filling a glass and handling it "Take that and drink slowly"

She took the glass and swallowed the water slowly one mouthful after another. Slowly the pain subsided, was soon replaced by a sour throbbing, and then suddenly disappeared. The baby had stopped crying and was slowly sobbing. The mother was rocking him with soothing words.

Her neighbor to the left hadn’t shown any sign of discomfort what so ever and he was busy staring through the window. She tried to have a look herself and could see shining lights as if the whole ground was ablaze. The noise of the engines grew louder. She heard dull noises from below her feet and then suddenly she felt a shock; a vibration that shook the whole plane. The engines started to scream and she felt her whole body projected forward, the seat belt squeezing against her abdomen. Some people in the cabin started to applaud. Slowly the big plane slowed down and stopped. The engine’s scream decreased quickly and was replaced by a rumbling noise. Some people started to stand up, but the attendants who were walking along the aisles told the passengers to stay in their seats.

"Please wait until the plane has completely stopped to leave your seats" she heard through the speakers.

While the plane was taxiing toward its landing location, she could see large white conic shapes through the window, like huge tents brightly lit: the famous Jeddah airport landmark. The plane walked slowly alongside other big planes then turned around and stopped. The engines noise dwindled and finally stopped completely. That was the signal: all the passengers stood up and cluttered up the aisles. Bins were opened and they vomited luggages, bags, jackets. Some people were stretching to remove muscle stiffness. Aurora decided to stay in her seat and wait. Both her co-passengers seemed to have taken the same decision. After a few moments the crowd start to move slowly forward and when the aisle at her level was almost empty, the mother asked her to hold the baby for a second so that she could herself stand up and stretch. She extracted a plastic travel bag from the bin, took the infant back, and started walking toward the front of the plane.

The next seat Pinoy nudged her to stand up and move out so that he could leave his seat. She stood up and felt her legs abandoning her, she almost fell and had to grab the front seat. Nine hours of sitting in the same position was reclaiming its toll. She sat on the arm rest until she could feel her legs coming back to life and proceeded to the front of the plane.

When she reached the door the outside humidity hit her face like a wet hot towel. In front of her a long metallic staircase that ended up next to a big autobus swallowing the arriving passengers. "Thank you and come again" Said the smiling attendant next to the door.

Aurora climbed slowly down holding the banister with one hand and her sports bag in the other. When she reached the bottom, she could see the big plane in its entirety. It looked like a huge white beast shining under the yellow projectors on top of high towers. She climbed into the bus which was already full so she had to stay standing. She grabbed a stainless steel pole. She looked around to see if she could find some familiar faces like the mother that had been her travel companion, but she was not around. Next to her, were several women dressed in a long black cloak that covered them from head to toes, including the face. The feel of loneliness emerged again. She was now in a foreign land, far away from all of her beloved family and friends, and far away from her familiar surroundings.

The bus started with jolt and slowly moved in front of the line of big planes then finally arrived in front of a large building. A brightly lit door opened and khaki soldiers, some armed with sub machine guns, directed the passengers to the opening.

Compared to the moist heat outside, the inside of the building was very icy which caused her to shiver under her light shirt. She felt her nose tingle and she sneezed. She knew about AC’s and she had experienced it several times in shopping malls, but it was never this cold.  She followed the other passengers towards the long lines in front of booths, behind which were soldiers checking passports making loud noises "clang, clang, clang" with their stamps. She took out her passport and the form that she had been asked to fill on the plane, and took her place at the end of one of the lines.

An officer walking along the lines was separating the women, showing them a separate booth in front of which women and children were already lining up.

When he approached her he asked. "Contract worker?"

"Yes"

"Passport?"

She gave him her passport and he flipped the pages quickly until he found the visa.

"Contract?"

Aurora got the envelope from her purse and gave it to the military man. He extracted the document and returned the envelope. After quickly perusing the document, he folded it, put it in the passport and put the passport in his breast pocket.

"Go there" he said indicating an area in the lobby where several women had assembled. Aurora wanted to say something like "my passport, my contract" but the officer had already left her addressing himself to another woman behind her.

"Contract worker?"

She walked slowly towards the group. Yesterday she had 500 Pesos, a passport, a contract. Now the only thing she had left was an empty envelope. She held onto it as though it were the only proof left of her humanity.

There were several nationalities represented in the group of woman: Indians in saris, small hooded Indonesian, some Arabs with white head dresses falling over the shoulder and many Philippinas. Aurora was not totally alone after all. The women had assembled by nationalities and she directed her self to her Kabayans. There were no seats available so they were all sitting on the floor. She sat next to a mature woman that looked slightly older than her. Like her, she only had a small travel bag.

"May I sit next to you?" She asked in Tagalog

"Yes please" Answered the woman in the same language "You came with the plane from Manila?"

"Yes"

"This is my first time in Saudi Arabia" Said the woman, trying to start a conversation.

"Me too"

"You look unwell. The trip was long, huh?"

"Does it show ?"

"I am a nurse. I can see on you face that you are very tired" She put her hand on her forehead "You have a little fever" She opened her purse and took some tablets." Here take that with some water" Aurora felt overwhelmed by emotions, by the kindness of the unknown woman. She was in dire need of comfort, of some humanity, something to ease her loneliness.

"Salamat po" she said gratefully.

Aurora stood up and looked around to see if there was any place to get water. She saw the indication of rest room and walked there to find out water. She soon came back next to the friendly nurse "The water is not drinkable"

"There is an office over there, maybe they can give you some water" She said indicating a door through which she could see an occupied desk.

Inside the room was not only a desk, but also a sofa and a few arm chairs, which were all occupied by men dressed in uniforms or in the local white garb and red checkered head gear. On the coffee table, there was a large thermos bottle with small glasses and some of the occupants were sipping what looked like tea. They were all staring at her as though she were coming from another planet, offended as if she had violated a private assembly.

"Excuse me, can I have some water?" She asked to the officer behind the desk.

"Get out, get out" said the officer with an angry face and with the accompanying gesture of the hand. "You cannot come here"

She opened her hand showing the medication "I need to take medication"

"Yallah, yallah, get out, get out"

He was getting more and more angrier, and with more hand waves, he was showing the door. The other occupants of the room were making loud remarks. Although, she did not speak Arabic, she knew she was the target and the laughters revealed the total lack of sympathy and borderline rejection, from the sitting men. She was not welcome.

She retreated ashamed, not understanding the mean attitude of these men. On her way back to the friendly nurse, she tried to swallow the pills using her own saliva, but her mouth was too dry. She almost threw up.

"They refused to give me water, and there was a thermos bottle on the table with several glasses. They even laughed at me. I tried to swallow the pills using only saliva"

The nurse looked around and saw a plastic water bottle in the hand of a woman sitting near by.

"Can I have some water?" she asked. "My friend here is not feeling well."

Obligingly, the woman handed the bottle over.

She gave her the bottle and she could take a few gulps. She returned the bottle "Salamat po"

"You are welcome Tita" Came the answer.

They waited for several hours. In the mean time, more planes had landed; more women had joined the group that now totaled almost a hundred. Aurora looked at the big clock on the wall. It was indicating two o’clock. She had landed over three hours ago. Some women tried to lay down on the cold tiles trying to catch some sleep, but once in while an official or what looked an official would pass by and yell at them "no sleep, no sleep."

Other women tried to get some information about their situation from the passing officials. The only thing they got was "Wait here, later, not now, I don’t know…." Most just shrugged, showing total disinterest.

A cleaner in a blue jump suit pushing a wheeled bucket with a mop passed nearby. A Pinoy.

"Hey kabayan" called the nurse.

He came to them pushing his bucket, looking around un-eased.

"Do you know how long we will have to wait here? What are we doing here" asked the nurse.

"They will come and get you to the female waiting room" he answered obviously anxious as though he were doing something, he knew was illegal and the reaction came quickly. An official in the local white dress and a rust colored beard came out of a nearby office and started to shout in Arabic to the cleaner who sheepishly left the women pushing his water bucket.

"Matawa^[2]" she heard somebody saying behind her.

Finally after a wait that had lasted an eternity, an official came about and told them to follow him. He brought them into a large windowless room with benches. In the middle of the room were plastic table cloths, with several large stainless steel plates of smoking rice with some pieces of chicken on top of them. On a table large buckets of water with ice cubes and stacks of plastic glasses.

The women rushed to the water table and within minutes most [of the] buckets were empty. The staff in blue jumpsuits took the buckets in what looked like a kitchen, to bring them back with more icy water. After gulping several glasses, Aurora looked around to find her new friend. The nurse was already sitting in front of one of the plates and was helping herself with the food. She sat next to her and started eating. It was her first real meal for almost twenty hours. One full day without food, and she could feel the cramps of hunger in her stomach that the smell of food had suddenly awakened. The rice was sticky and did not taste the same as the rice back home, but she was too hungry to complain. Out of a long habit of eating without cutlery, she used her fingers to mold small balls that she put in her mouth. She helped herself with some of the remaining small pieces of chicken.

After such a long wait, this was heaven. After the meal and cleaning themselves in the adjacent restroom, the women again gathered by nationality occupying the plastic benches and seats. She had sat herself next to the friendly nurse. The food had removed part of their lethargy and some conversations started in many different languages. Around her she could hear the different dialects of her home country, Tagalog, Visaya, Mindanao, Taglish.

The Indian staff had quickly removed the empty dishes and disappeared in the kitchen. She had noticed that at no time, were they engaged in any conversation with the women, although several women had tried to talk to them. They were obviously following orders: conversations between opposite sexes were forbidden.

Suddenly speakers hidden in the ceiling blared "Allaaaaah Akbar, Allaaaah Akbar" followed by a long Arabic howling she could not understand. As on command all the Indonesian women, some Indians and other nationalities she could not recognize stood up and went to the rest room. One by one they came back drying their hands and faces on their clothes. Once back in the room they aligned them self side by side in a corner of the room removed their shoes and laid on the floor small carpets they took out of their bags.

Although there is a 5% Muslim population in the Philippines, Aurora had never seen Muslims praying and looked fascinated at what looked like ritualistic gymnastics. At the church, she was used to different positions during the mass: Standing, sitting, kneeling. But this looked very different: standing, bending, kneeling, deeply bending with their forehead on the floor, standing again several times. One by one, their gymnastics finished, they rolled the small carpets, put their shoes back , and returned to their seats.

The end of the prayer must have been some sort of signal, because almost immediately after an official entered the room with a pile of passports in his hand. Opening them one by one, he called some of their names. When their names were called, some of the women stood up and were directed to the door that the official had come from. When he had gone through all the passports he had brought with him, the official left the room through the same door and closed it.

Once in while, the official returned, calling a new batch of women and he promptly disappeared through the door. Her nurse friend had been called during one of the first batches and had also disappeared behind the door, but not without kissing her goodbye. Again, she was alone.

After three hours, only a handful of women of different nationalities were left. It was now eight o’clock in the next morning, because the room had no windows she did not seen the sun rise. She started to feel hungry again and looked around to see if she could locate some food. The dishes had been removed. Even the buckets of water had disappeared. She walked to the kitchen door, but it was locked. Her mouth had become very dry, so she went to the restroom to drink some water.

An Indonesian woman with her white hood was cleaning her hands. They smiled at each other: companions of misfortune. She opened the faucet and was about to get some water when the other woman started to shout "Haram, Haram", nodding forcefully "No" with her head, obviously upset. She looked at her inquisitively. Why was she upset? She looked around for any indication that the water was not drinkable. Found nothing and resume her drinking attempt which triggered more shouts from the other woman "Ramadan, Ramadan". She had no idea why this woman was reacting like that. She looked at her inquiringly. The woman made the drinking gesture with her hand and saying something she could not understand in which the words "Ramadan", "Haram" were repeated many times while shaking her head with violent negation sign. Not wanting to upset the Indonesian woman even more, she selected a stall as if to relieve her self on the squatting type of toilet and closed the door, waiting for the other woman to leave. When she came out, the restroom was empty. She quickly went to a sink and started drinking with long gulps, while watching at the entrance at the same time.

Back in the waiting room another batch of women were gone. She looked around to see if there was any Philippinas left among the half dozen woman in the room, there was one, a motherly looking middle age woman. She was looking at her invitingly with eyes saying "Come sit next to me, I need your company"

"Excuse me" asked Aurora while sitting next to her "Are you from Manila?"

"Yes, Quezon city and you?"

"Pasig. You came with the Manila flight of last night?"

"Yes. Is this the first time in Saudi Arabia?"

"Yes, what about you?"

"No, this is my second time".

This was unexpected luck. She had found somebody who would shed light on the events of the last few hours.

"Was it the same thing when you came before?"

"Not really, my last contract was in a Riyadh hospital and the conditions were a little better. We did not have to wait in the arrival lobby for so long. All contract workers were immediately directed in the female waiting room. We only had to wait for fifteen, twenty minutes and my employer was already waiting for me"

"Did they take your passport, last time?"

"Oh yes, as well as my contract" She explained "The employer is supposed to present himself with his own copy of the contract at the airport so that we could be released to him"

"But they do that only for women. I did not see the same thing being done to men."

"Saudis will tell you they do that for our own protection. In reality they cannot accept unaccompanied women walking on the street, or taking taxis. For them, women are less than children."

"So I have to wait for my sponsor to pick me up?"

"Yes, your agency in Manila should have sent him a fax announcing your arrival time and your plane"

She looked at the clock on the wall. 8:45, made a quick calculation and said "We arrived at Eleven, that’s about ten hours ago. How come my employer has not come yet?"

"I do not know. I am also waiting for my employer. He is also late."

"Are they going to bring food? I start to feel hungry"

"This is Ramadan. Muslims fast from sunrise to sunset. The food we had before the prayer were the last before tonight"

"But I am not a Muslim! I am a Christian"

"I know, but the Saudis forbid anyone from eating while they have to fast and you cannot drink either"

"No drinks?"

"No drinks either! If you get caught you will be severely punished" She said "My previous employer, a western run hospital, was very humane and he allowed all the non-Muslims in the staff to drink and eat, but it had to be done in a closed room outside of the main building" She added "But I know not every employer is like that. Many become moody and bad tempered and they will punish you, even for small mistakes"

"Until sunset?"

"Until sunset. They do not fast like Christians. Christians reduce their food intake for the duration of fasting days but the Muslims fast completely during daytime and once the sun sets they party all night long. As a nurse, I have seen many come to the hospital with indigestion, liver failure, and sometimes, heart attack for over eating on an empty stomach.

"No discipline?"

"No, even worse, they all have bad breath because they are too afraid to swallow while brushing their teeth"

Aurora was feeling farther away from her own world, The hours passed by and more women came in, more were called and left, but her name was not yet on the list. At twelve O’clock again, there was another call for prayer and again at three o’clock. Around four o’clock she had lost her new-found companion: her name was called. The two women kissed each other goodbye

"Good luck" said the departing woman.

Again, she was alone. She took her rosary out of her purse and tried to concentrate on her prayers "Holy mother who art in the heaven….." But her mouth was dry and she was feeling the cramps of hunger in her stomach. She looked at the clock. Five o’clock.

At six thirty again, there was a blaring call for prayer. But this time something new happened, the door of the kitchen opened and staff came out carrying buckets of icy water and the same large trays of steaming rice.. All the women rushed to the water and the food. After a quick drink and a small handful of rice the Muslim women gathered for prayer.

After this long dry day, interrupted only by quick forays to the rest room for quick drinks of tepid water, the icy water felt so good. She slowly swallowed long gulps, appreciating every drop. She then sat in front of a tray and started to eat. This time it was mutton. She had never eaten mutton before, the fatty look of some yellow pieces, the overpowering smell almost made her throw up, but she tried to compose herself. At least there was the rice that she ate hungrily directly from the palm of her hand, not taking the time to make the small balls. She was feeling her body reviving. She tried some pieces of meat but could not stand its rubbery consistency, so she concentrated on the rice.

And the hours succeeded to the hours. Seven, eight. Prayer. Nine. More women came in and more women went out.

Several times she had gone to the official in charge of the women liberation and tried to get some news, but they always gave the same answer "Wait".

She was exhausted. Except for the few hours dozing on the plane, she had been almost two days without sleep. She had tried to lay down on the floor to get some sleep, but each time she had been forced to sit by the officials "no sleep, no sleep".

Ten, eleven. And around midnight "Delacruz!"

She thought she had heard her name. Not seeing anybody move, the official repeated "Delacruz"

It was her name. Finally somebody had come to pick her up!

With her bag in one hand and her purse in the other, she walked to the door, to what looked like freedom after almost a full day locked in the windowless room.

"Cover your head before leaving the room" said the official

She looked at him not understanding what he said.

"You have nothing to cover your head? Where is your abaya?", he asked

Still not understanding the order, she nodded "no"

The official shrugged impatiently and moved toward the door.

Behind the door, there was a Saudi man waiting in an office. He was huge, with a beefy face under the head dress with small porcine eyes that were scrutinizing her. She could see his protuberant belly pushing the white dress like he was pregnant with a complete basketball team, the wide upper body with almost female like breasts. Folds of his multiple chins were hiding parts of his short goatee surrounding a small baby like mouth.

He signed a release form, was handed her passport that he quickly shoved in his breast pocket.

"I am Sheik al Mureidi" he said with a booming voice, emphasizing the word Sheik. "Follow me". The words seem to come from his belly, a little like a contrabass.

She followed him in a corridor; they passed through a door that brought them back to the big arrival lobby.

This time, she was in the other side of the booths, that she had seen when she arrived. Behind the booths, there were long lines of arriving passengers. The large stainless steel carrousels were disgorging luggages that workers in blue jumpsuits pilled on dollies.

"Do you have baggage’s?" asked the big man

"No" She said showing the plastic sport bag "Only this"

On the Opposite side of] the booths, there were several counters with small conveyor belts and more passengers lining up. Behind the belts, custom officers were checking the baggages. Opening each suitcase, bag and parcel, scrutinizing the contents and many times, spreading everything on the belt. Men in blue jumpsuits were using cutters to cut stings, scotch tape, wrapping paper, cardboard. The Sheik brought her to one of the counters, bypassed the line of awaiting passenger as if it were his god given right not to wait with the commoners. Seeing him cutting into the head of the line, the custom officer was about to tell him to go at the end, but again with a booming voice he announced "I am Sheik al Mureidi" with the word "Sheik" highlighted.

The custom officer had recognized the arrogance of the type of people you do not mess around if you want to keep your job. Obsequiously he said "Maharaba Saïd" and then to her "Put your purse and your bag on the belt"

The custom officer quickly checked the almost empty purse, found her wallet opened it, flipping through the pictures of her past one by one and soon discarded it, putting it back in the purse.

"Open" he said, pointing at the sport bag.

She unzipped it and presented the open bag for inspection. Seeing the hands of the man foraging through her meager belongings, she felt soiled and violated in her intimacy. Piece by piece, the officer put the articles on the belt for every one to see: spare brassieres, spare panties, a few t-shirts and blouses, cotton dresses and two cotton nightgowns. Her humiliation was growing with each object. She was forced to go through a psychological public strip tease

A small plush cat with a pink ribbon and a missing eye landed in the middle of the cloths. Jay had given her his most valuable possession. "Take Ming-ming with you, mom. You will not be alone." Poor Jay who could sleep without Ming-ming, had made the supreme sacrifice. She tried to refuse it, but he insisted on stuffing the toy in her bag.

"What is that?" The custom officer extracted the small Santo Niño statue, he found in the bag and looked at it with repulsion, as if it were some monstrous pornographic object. "When you feel alone, when you miss your family, when you feel despair, Santo Niño will give you the courage you need" Nanay had told her, giving her the small plastic doll-like statue. Using bits and pieces of silk, she had taken a whole day to lovingly hand sew the small costume, including the small felt red hat.  She had gone to the priest to have it blessed and it was now her most precious belonging. She had lost the 500 Peso bill her father had given her. The Santo Niño and Ming-ming were all she had left, the only objects that could link her to her previous life.

"This is my Santo Niño" she said imploringly.

"Haram" said the custom officer before throwing it disgustingly in a large trash-can, behind the belt.

Even if he had slapped her in the face, the effect of it would have hurt her less. Looking at the trash can where the precious statue had disappeared, she felt big tears coming through her eyes, her heart was torn apart. She was paralyzed her eyes staring at the trash can, "No!" she cried under the shock of the blasphemous act.

She begged with her hand stretched toward the bin "Please, please give me my Santo Niño back."

But the customer officer ignored her plead. He had started checking the next set of baggages. She was grabbed near her upper arm and pulled backwards forcefully

"I don’t have time for this stupidity" said the big man. He had snatched her purse, stuffed the still-opened bag with the objects on the belt, and walked hurriedly towards the main exit door pushing her brutally forward. She almost lost her balance, retrieved it and walked awkwardly, still held by the steely hand on her arm. She turned her head toward the last resting place of the statue, but it was now out of sight.

Blinded by the tears in her eyes she walked mechanically, being pulled, almost carried, by the big man. A door opened automatically revealing a crowd of Indians and Pakistanis men gathered behind a stainless steel barrier all looking anxiously at each newcomer, but she was blind to it all as, her head was still with the disappearance of the Santo Niño.

Walking briskly, for his weight and size, he directed her to a revolving door and they were outside, back in the hot humidity. Immediately, on command, a big white suburban van, the kind she had never seen before in her country, appeared in front of them.

"Sit in the back seat, the big man ordered her while climbing into the front, still carrying her bag. As soon as the doors closed, the van, which was driven by a small Indian, lifted off.

"You have embarrassed me terribly with that silly statue in your bag" The big man announced from the front row with a condemning tone, turning his head just enough so she could hear. He then added "For your punishment, I will cut your first month of salary".

Aurora’s new life in Saudi Arabia had begun.